Recently while scrolling along my Facebook timeline, I noticed a friend of mine posted this picture on her page. In my opinion, it not only questioned a woman’s priorities but most importantly her “loyalty”. The picture depicted a thin solo blanket spread along the floor in the place of a bed, outlined in what appears to be Christmas lights, with sofa throw pillows propped upon the wall, a centerpiece comprised of a small candle and two wine glasses resting neatly on what looks to be a silver platter placed on a fury space rug complete with a trail of rose petals leading the way for a “romantic touch”. I answered in the comments section of this photo without delay “HELL NO!” I then shared this same photo to my own Facebook and allowed my friends to answer the very same question I had. The responses blew my mind to say the least:
Women from all backgrounds, ethnicities and walks of life without hesitation responded “Stay”. Only one responder thought to ask the question “for how long?” Then went on to state “this would not be acceptable for her long term, she would not “stay” UNLESS an uncontrollable situation was at hand ie: the man had recently moved and was awaiting his furniture, even then he would have to AT LEAST provide an air mattress or hotel room. I could have hugged this woman till the end of time! Simply because SOMEONE other than myself saw a problem here!!! Some women even went on to say “it’s the thought that counts!” as if it would matter the least bit to your aching back first thing in the morning when you awoke to the natural light shining in on the reality that you just allowed a man to sucker you into not only sleeping on the floor, but thinking you were special because he chose YOU to do it!!! In my opinion, women have become so complacent and accepting due to a male instigated stigma that she should be “humble” and WAIT “for a man to get his shxt together” to show her loyalty, commitment and dedication to HIM! If not she is labeled a gold digger, not a “ride or die” and overall “unworthy” of his riches when he DOES accrue them!
Dating back to biblical times women were a sought after and prized centerpiece to a man’s life. A man would work for 14 years without pay simply to have the woman’s hand in marriage he truly loved; now days men barely want to work. Especially if she happens to already be well educated and established. Once upon a time men would fight for a woman’s honor, shower them with gifts and even attempt to win over the woman’s family especially her father by showcasing how financially stable, physically dependable and logical he was….yet here we are now in the year 2021 accepting a blanket on the floor surrounded in Christmas lights! The only plus was that whoever the fellow was that set up the ambiance was generous enough to place it near a wall plug so she can AT LEAST charge her phone! That’s if he paid the electricity bill. Why has it become a woman’s burden to accept a man for who and where he is in life, especially if she has surpassed him?
Even Disney princess’s have higher standards than us!! Now days all he must do is buy her a Wendy’s combo and if she is “the one” she will be grateful! ESPECIALLY if he allows her to supersize it from a 4 count nugget to a 6! This means he must REALLY LIKE HER!!! Ladies……CUT IT OUTTTT!!!!
The number one MYTH women always seem to think or fall for is: “If I stay this will guarantee my position in his life and in his heart”.
Did Mary J. Blige teach yall NOTHING!!!! While she bellowed on for 4 minutes in the song “Not Gon Cry” about how she worked day & night for a man as his lover and secretary, assisting him in getting his business and affairs together for 11 YEARS only to find he was HAVING AN AFFAIR and wanted another woman instead! She said she wasn’t “going to cry” yet did just that the entire song.
Ladies let’s get back to standards. Demanding that a man do his part and play his role in the relationship is NOT asking for too much! We need to stop offering free samples of what a WIFE would be like to men that ARENT OFFERING SAMPLES OF A HUSBAND. Stop settling for the title of “wifey” while doing WIFE duties, that’s like accepting a lower position at work but doing your supervisors job! I know my post may come off as blunt or even like I am bashing ALL men trying to better themselves with a great woman but it’s not true. There are some that do not mind doing for a woman, simply in a bad place AT THE MOMENT. Some men have done for a woman in the past and been done wrong. This can jade them from wanting to do this again and run the risk the bad luck of getting another “using @ss woman”.
However, women risk themselves EVERYTIME we give ourselves emotionally, mentally and physically. If we held back in any of those areas, a relationship would cease to exist. Drop the excuse for being selfish, greedy and bitter men and continue to show women what they NEED YOU FOR!!!! Y’all constantly saying you hate women that “act like they don’t need a man” but who would? Seeing that we have our own jobs, pay our own bills, sponsor our own upkeep and dildos now come with bunny ears 😇. I’m not being stuck up for NOT wanting to give it up on the floor (unless we moved there from the BED😝).