The Best Man ♥️

When I reflect back on past loves and relationships I can’t help but feel a bit relieved. Not because any of my exes were horrible people (as most would say, mostly out of pure denial that they could have actually been great people just not for them). No, many of my exes are still AMAZING people that do great things and fortunately we have no hard feelings. It takes a certain level of understanding and emotional maturity to maintain any level of friendship with someone you once had strong emotions for however, if it can be accomplished it is actually a splendid way to find the one that ACTUALLY is meant for you!!!

YES!! I am CRAZY actually but without official diagnosis you got nothing…Anyways think of this, who else knows you better than your mother and individuals you have opened up to intimately? Let’s face it somethings mama don’t even know *wink. An ex can be an EXcellent look in the mirror sometimes! They can tell you what made them fall in love and what made them block you all those times.

As I stated earlier this recycled relationship takes a GREAT DEAL OF EMOTIONAL MATURITY” if not you two will just end up pointing fingers at each other again and revisiting all the horrible reasons the other exist or better yet ending up in bed all over again! Be honest with yourself before attempting to befriend an ex ensure you no longer want anything more than friendship (if you are already in a relationship be sure this is ok with your partner, it’s not everyday your significant other is pleased you bumped into your ex and asked them how you can be a better person). If you are single and this was your most recent ex maybe let a little time lapse before trying to ask them for truce and insight.

I have exes I am able to reflect with and I have some I shouldn’t speak to for a variety of reasons. For business concerns I can communicate with one that understands my impulsiveness and knows how anxious I can be in regards to spending. Drove him nuts and ultimately drove us apart but now he assist me with stocks, bonds, loans and a wealth of knowledge for other financial services. There is no romance only simple concern and genuine fondness for a great financial guru. ..but there is more than JUST the info, he KNOWS me inside and out figuratively and literally, so he is more personable with my intentions and in a way personalized just for me.

Another ex is GREAT at telling me about MYSELF!!! I am currently in a relationship and extremely happy however even in paradise you pay taxes. I can count on him not to hold back on honesty and I can count on him to tell me if I was truly wrong about a situation or not. Not to say that I ALWAYS speak to my exes about my relationship troubles but I do believe a certain mental and emotional wellness comes from being able to check yourself sometimes to see if you are “trippin” or not. Never the less this person tells me when I am perhaps going overboard and when I am DEFINITLY in the right to be upset.

This partner and I grew apart due to family preferences and life goals. They were simply on a journey I did not want to enjoy with them and vice versa, we were honest about this and found much better hiking partners. This is what I mean by saying an ex can be an EXceptional asset to your team if you play it right! Even if HE wasn’t THE MAN he can help you find the BEST MAN by first figuring out WHO YOU ARE and WHAT YOU TRULY WANT. Just a thought…

Published by Some Dope Black Girl Writes....

"Some dope black girl writes" is inspired by the everyday life of a melanated, educated and sophisticated young woman living in an era where she is too young to remember slavery, segregation or "White's Only" locations but now old enough to be terrified at what may come again. Are our people strong enough this time to LIVE not just survive?

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